Amazing genes

Best thing that ever happened to you

congratulations on giving birth to me

Dad bought this…

Enough of a present

Every time you sneeze

From your little mistake…

Happy Mothers Day from…

Hi mum. I got you a card.

It’s like Father’s Day…

Just another sunday

One of my favourite parents

Put as much thought into…

putting me up for adoption

Saggy tits…

Sit back and relax…

Skipping the pill…

Sorry for all that stupid shit

Sorry I haven’t moved out yet

Sorry i ruined…

Supporting me financially…

Swear so fucking much

Thanks mum I turned out amazing

We both know I’m your favourite

World’s greatest Mum…

You fucking legend

You miserable cow

You’re bloody amazing